Wow, anon. Kudos to you for the best question I’ve ever gotten.
And it may surprise you to find out that I thoroughly disagree with you. Believe me, I absolutely understand what you are arguing, and it does make sense. The Doctor is slightly more shitty a chaperone in Moffat’s Who than in RTD’s.
But here’s why, quite frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn:
aghh i hate riversong. so OLD! ew. erghh. your opinion?
i don’t dislike river song in herself and i adore alex kingston. she’s gorgeous and talented. i think river had potential. however, i have many a qualm with her storyline (i don’t ship doctor/river either). it’s…
Idk about the marriage, frankly. I know some Eleven/River shippers like it, but I found it disturbing and squicky that she would put up with his crap. “You embarrass me” … “I don’t want to marry you” … “Do as you’re told.”
If this were an alternate Whoniverse, and that had been my wonderful bb Rose he had been talking to - I wouldn’t have wanted her to marry him - I would have wanted her to SLAP him and tell him where to shove it, and ‘where does he get off talking to her like that’??
So I think some shippers certainly might squee, and try to handwave the dialogue, or - even more absurdly - try to make it seem sweet and loving, but it’s pretty ridiculous. I’m beginning to wonder if MOFFAT even ships Eleven/River - he’s made River into basically a doormat, and Eleven into an asshat.
THIS! I still haven’t figured out how anyone can see a romantic side to that ‘wedding’. I certainly didn’t see any love on the side of the Doctor for that wedding, actually didn’t even seem like he liked her at that point.
Okay, I wanted to answer my two anons quite thoroughly, so I decided to do a bit of sexual meta. Meaning, I meta about sex because LOL that is what my life is.
First, I’m going to point out some contextual suggestions of dancing in the latter portion of S2. And then I’ll get to cast and crew quotes (especially those by RTD). I know my meta is very arousing, but do try to hold off on getting off until afterwards. So enjoy this slightly disjointed meta.